Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Sudoku
Soccer quotes and saying
Soccer is not just about scoring goals – it’s about winning.
We lost because we didn’t win.
If they are going to win this match, they’re going to have to score a goal.
Soccer is simple, but it is difficult to play simple.
Soccer is the ballet of the masses.
If you are first you are first. If you are second, you are nothing.
If you don’t concede any goals you’ll win more games than you lose.
If you’re attacking, you don’t get as tired as when you’re chasing.
As long as no-one scored, it was always going to be close.
Whoever invented soccer should be worshipped as a God.
I was surprised, but I always say nothing surprises me in soccer.
Soccer is all very well as a game for rough girls, but is hardly suitable for delicate boys.
I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock.
A million wouldn’t buy him, and I’d be one of them.
If you don’t believe you can win, there is no point in getting out of bed at the end of the day.
It’s why we play the game. Anything is possible, anything can happen, and we proved that again tonight.
The more time you have, the more mistakes you will make.
We were a little bit outnumbered there, it was two against two.
I’ve never wanted to leave. I’m here for the rest of my life, and hopefully after that as well.
We didn’t underestimate them. They were a lot better than we thought.
I took a whack on my left ankle, but something told me it was my right.
The rules of soccer are very simple, basically it is this: if it moves, kick it. If it doesn’t move, kick it until it does.
He’s one of those footballers whose brains are in his head.
My legs sort of disappeared from nowhere.
The Vision of a Champion is someone who is bent over, drenched in sweat, and the point of exhaustion, when no one else is watching.
Sometimes in soccer you have to score goals.
Every defeat is a victory in itself.
Soccer is the opera of the people.
The opening ceremony was good, although I missed it
If we played like that every week we wouldn’t be so inconsistent.
Soccer is an art more central to our culture than anything the Arts Council deigns to recognize.
Winning doesn’t really matter as long as you win.
The most important thing for a forward is speed of thought. Top players read the game.
The roots of our Soccer Tribe lie deep in our primeval past.
Short funny quotes
have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it.
It’s not cheating unless you get caught.
Quitting smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I’ve done it dozens of times.
I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot.
I hope life isn’t a joke, because I don’t get it.
There is a light at the end of every tunnel….just pray it’s not a train!.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Avoid hangovers: stay drunk.
Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, so waste your time and have the time of your life !
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.
I’m knot a blonde! I’m knot, I’m knot, I’m knot!
Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.
I’ve got problem for your solution…
Some say the glass is half full, some say the glass is half empty. I say “Are you gonna drink that?”
Your school GPA is inversely proportionate to your girlfriend’s looks and vise versa.
Everyone has a photographic memory… some just don’t have film.
Common sense is the most evenly distributed quantity in the world. Everyone thinks he has enough.
All people have the right to stupidity but some abuse the privilege.
When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again ?
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
X-men the first class...
Jawapan daripada pelempang
Ada seorang pemuda yang lama sekolah di luar negeri, kembali ke tanah air. Sesampainya di rumah ia meminta kepada orang tuanya untuk mencari seorang guru agama, kiyai atau sesiapa sahaja yang boleh menjawab 3 pertanyaannya. Akhirnya orang tua pemuda itu mendapatkan orang tersebut, seorang kiyai.
Pemuda: Anda siapa? Dan apakah bisa menjawab pertanyaan-pertanyaan saya?
Kiyai : Saya hamba Allah dan dengan izin-Nya saya akan menjawab pertanyaan anda.
Pemuda: Anda yakin? Sedangkan Profesor dan ramai orang yang pintar tidak mampu menjawab pertanyaan saya.
Kiyai : Saya akan mencuba sejauh kemampuan saya.
Pemuda: Saya ada 3 pertanyaan:-
- Kalau memang Tuhan itu ada, tunjukan wujud Tuhan kepada saya
- Apakah yang dinamakan takdir
- Kalau syaitan diciptakan dari api kenapa dimasukan ke neraka yang dibuat dari api, tentu tidak menyakitkan buat syaitan. Sebab mereka memiliki unsur yang sama.. Apakah Tuhan tidak pernah berfikir sejauh itu?
Tiba-tiba kyai tersebut menampar pipi pemuda tadi dengan keras.
Pemuda (sambil menahan sakit): Kenapa anda marah kepada saya?
Kiyai : Saya tidak marah…Tamparan itu adalah jawaban saya atas 3 pertanyaan yang anda ajukan kepada saya.
Pemuda: Saya sungguh-sungguh tidak mengerti..
Kiyai : Bagaimana rasanya tamparan saya?
Pemuda: Tentu saja saya merasakan sakit.
Kiyai : Jadi anda percaya bahwa sakit itu > > ada?
Pemuda: Ya!
Kiyai : Tunjukan pada saya wujud sakit itu!
Pemuda: (terkebil-kebil…)
Kiyai : Itulah jawaban pertanyaan pertama…kita semua merasakan kewujudan Tuhan tanpa mampu melihat
Kiyai : Apakah tadi malam anda bermimpi akan ditampar oleh saya?
Pemuda: Tidak.
Kiyai : Apakah pernah terfikir oleh anda akan menerima sebuah tamparan dari saya hari ini?
Pemuda: Tidak.
Kiyai : Itulah yang dinamakan takdir.
Kiyai : Terbuat dari apa tangan yang saya gunakan untuk menampar anda?
Pemuda: Kulit.
Kiyai : Terbuat dari apa pipi anda?
Pemuda: Kulit.
Kiyai : Bagaimana rasanya tamparan saya?
Pemuda: Sakit.
Kiyai : Walaupun syaitan dijadikan dari api dan neraka juga terbuat dari api, jika Tuhan menghendaki maka neraka akan menjadi tempat yang menyakitkan untuk syaitan.
Karak
Sunday, June 26, 2011
GERKO
x perlu tipu laa....
Soalan yang dijawap dengan pelempang
-Bertanya kepada kwan yang jual barang sekenhen .
-"Abang kawin lagi satu boleh? "
-Bertanya pada isteri, padahal nak beli rokok pun mintak duit bini.
-"Bang ada bateri AA tak? "
-Bertanya pada penjual daging
-"Lesen beli ke ? "
-Bertanya pada orang yang tersepit dalam kereta akibat langgar pokok.
-"Lif rosak lagi ke ? "
-Bertanya pada orang yang dah naik tangga sampai tingkat tujuh .
-"Kau ni mat rempit ye ? "
-Bertanya pada orang yang kaki, tangan dan muka kena balut.
-"CD ori ada ke ? "
-Bertanya pada penjual CD haram kat depan kedai burger.
-"Kat sini ada buaya ke ? "
-Bertanya pada orang yang sedang mandi di kolam renang.
-"Boleh bayar ngan kad kredit tak ? "
-Bertanya pada penjual aiskrim.
KOMEN STATUS BODOH KAT FESBUK
Status: nak makan apa hari ni yerk?
Komen tak terucap:makan kasut jamban aq yg putus nak??
Status:cuti-cuti Malaysia ni nak pi mana agaknya?
Komen tak terucap:pegi mampos sama lu
Status:x tau nak bagi present apa utk besday asben,bagi suggestion?
Komen x terucap:bagi kebenaran kawin lagi Saturday
Status:boring
Komen yang tak terucap;ada mak kesahhhhhh…..
Status:manusia bacul,macam-macam ko kutuk aku yer,apa salah aku kat ko?
Komen x terucap:ek elehh..face to face la,apahal cakap kat dinding fesbuk jek
Status:aduhh banyaknya assgmnt x siap lagi???
Komen:DAH TAHU X SIAP LAYAN FESBUK APA HAL???
Saturday, June 25, 2011
lonEly....vs Aq bukan koperasi
Sunyi sangat rase malam sabtu
atuk oh atuk....
SEORANG atuk menegur cucunya yang x cemerlang dalam peperiksaan
Atuk:tgok kwn2 sebaya cu,sume lulus cemerlang.Cu ni main internet,tv,bola..main je kejenya
Tu blom kire update blog 24 jam jek.Bila nak belajar?.ingat blog 2 bleh wat cu Berjaya??
(atuk marah tahap tertinggi)
CUcu:atuk ni asyik bandingkan saya dgn kawan2 yg lain.saya x penah pon marah atuk x sama
dgn Kawan2 atuk yg laen
Atuk:X SAMA APANYA?
CUcU:KAwan2 sebaya tok sume dah jadi arwah,kan?
Friday, June 24, 2011
the edge of glory-lady gaga
Tonight, yeah, baby! (Tonight, yeah, baby!)
And I got a reason that you're who should take me home tonight (Tonight)
I need a man that thinks it's right when it's so wrong
Tonight, yeah, baby! (Tonight, yeah, baby!)
Right on the limits where we know we both belong tonight
[Bridge:]
It's hard to feel the rush, to brush the dangerous
I'm gonna run right to, to the edge with you
Where we can both fall far in love
[Chorus:]
I'm on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment of truth
Out on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment with you
I'm on the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge,
I'm on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment with you
I'm on the edge with you.
Another shot before we kiss the other side
Tonight, yeah, baby! (Tonight, yeah, baby!)
I'm on the edge of something final we call life tonight
(Alright! Alright!)
Put on your shades, 'cause I'll be dancing in the flames
Tonight, yeah, baby! (Tonight, yeah, baby!)
It isn't hell if everybody knows my name tonight
(Alright! Alright!)
[Bridge:]
It's hard to feel the rush, to brush the dangerous
I'm gonna run right to, to the edge with you
Where we can both fall far in love
[Chorus:]
I'm on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment of truth
Out on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment with you
I'm on the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge,
I'm on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment with you
I'm on the edge with you.
I'm on the edge with you
I'm on the edge with you
(You, you, you...)
[Solo saxophone]
[Chorus:]
I'm on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment of truth
I'm on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment with you
I'm on the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge, the edge,
I'm on the edge of glory, and I'm hanging on a moment with you
I'm on the edge with you (with you, with you, with you, with you, with you)
ThE otHER sIde of Me
Thursday, June 23, 2011
SEBAB KENAPA KORANG KENE BLOCK KAT FACEBOOK
Anda pernah diblock dalam fb??
Prima is Pumakilla.....
4
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
mAhAraja Plawok
hUh...jangan kentut depan gay!!!
Wartawan itu dipasang dengan microphone n camera bersaiz kecil bagi merakam segala aksi dan aktiviti di kelab gay tersebut. Setelah masuk wartawan itu terus menuju ke bar utama dan memesan segelas bir. Dia hanya duduk sambil memerhatikan gelagat-gelagat gay di kelab tersebut. Ada yang menari dan ada yang duduk sambil berpeluk-pelukan sesama lelaki. Wartawan itu merasa geli geleman melihat tingkahlaku mereka.
"Hai...sorang ke bro", tiba-tiba wartawan itu di sapa.
"A'ah, saya tunggu kawan saya. Tak sampai-sampai lagi ni", kata wartawan itu separuh menjerit kerana kebingitan muzik di kelab itu.
Tiba-tiba wartawan itu berasa sakit perut. Rasa seperti ingin kentut sahaja.
"Muzik tengah kuat ni bolehlah aku kentut ni", bisik hati wartawan itu.
"Eh eh... ada dara lagi la kat sini", ujar salah seorang gay di situ sambil memandang wartawan itu.
"A'ah lah... kat depan kita ada dara", ujar yang lain pula.
Semua gay di situ telah pergi mendapatkan wartawan itu. Semua wajah mereka menunjukkan keghairahan nafsu yang ketara.
"Saya bukan dara lagi la", ujar wartawan itu.
"Kalau dah tak dara kenapa kentut. Kuat lak tu. Sempit tuu...", ujar salah seorang gay itu.
Tergamam wartawan itu. Akhirnya dirinya di noda secara bergilir-gilir oleh pengunjung kelab gay itu. Menangis teresak-esak wartawan itu. Akhirnya nikmat kentut sudah tidak akan dapat dirasai lagi sepanjang hidupnya.